Over at Twerblyderp Palace, Kate Middleton is taking lessons in Italian cooking from her and Prince William's new housekeeper Antonella Fresolone, known for her "homemade bread" and "delicious pasta." Never forget that Kate's a Topshop-wearing commoner like the rest of us! But this is pretty legit, actually, considering she could be lying around making Miss O'Brien feed chocolate-covered grapes to her mouth while fanning her uterus with a palm frond.
Tuck it away between McGriddles and that guy whose only dream in life is to be a human maxi pad in the Apocalypse Already Happened, We Just Missed It File: I have seen Patricia "Tan Mom" Krentcil's rap video, and it's AWFUL, but so awful that it's basically the 2013 version of "the Entertainment" from Infinite Jest. As in, I'm drooling now, and my butthole is really, really loose, and I'm losing all perspective, and who are these poor gay guys?!
Saturday Night Social: Ben Affleck and 'Ye West On SNL Season Finale
Bro. Bro. Bro. Bro. Seriously, bro, Ben Affleck hosts the 38th season finale of Saturday Night Live tonight with a really obscure toe dancer named Kanye West. Here's hoping they throw Baaahston more teasing/love, like they did in the old-school Jimmy Fallon/Rachel Dratch skits.
It's the oldest story in the book: Person Who Hates Women Can't Figure Out Why He Can't Get a Date With a Woman. But this one has a twist!
Justin Timberlake and Adam Driver unexpectedly duet in ways that make them feel good in Inside Llweyn Davis (previously entitled Peter, Paul and Mary: Twerk It).
The Anteater Baby Jesus Forgives You For Touching Yourself
Last month, Armani, a lady anteater at the LEO Zoological Conservation Center, gave birth to little Archie and mystified zoologists/the world, who had taken it upon themselves to cockblock Armani from their male anteater, Alf. Time-wise, Armani would have conceived when Alf was safely locked away in a separate pen.
Afghanistan Parliament Blocks Anti-Violence Against Women Law
The Law on Elimination of Violence Against Women, a 2009 mandate approved by President Hamid Karzai's decree that aims to protect women's rights — specifically, one that bans child marriage and the practice of "baad," selling and buying women to settle disputes — was shot down in Afghani Parliament today.
What TV's Still Missing: Working Moms and Female Anti-Heroes
As all different kinds of boundary-breaking female characters shoehorn their way onto TV these last few years, much has been written about Breaking Bad's "Skyler White Effect," the knee-jerk hatred of male anti-heroes' wives. Somehow, Skyler garners more fan hatred than the brilliant, evil meth cook and murderer she's…
Greta Gerwig Needed Noah Baumbach's Validation To Write Frances Ha
I don't think I'd be super off-base if I said that Greta Gerwig was the closest thing our generation has to old-school Diane Keaton; she's flighty and light on-screen, but there's melancholy and intelligence behind it. Her new movie Frances Ha, which she co-wrote with director (and boyfriend) Noah Baumbach, has been…
The unaired episodes of Don't Trust The B- In Apartment 23 are now available to stream on ABC's website. And also Hulu! (Thanks, commenters.)
